Topic awaiting preservation: Tough decision

Hello

Consider this situation, and advise, per your experience or age wisdom:

quote:

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An aged loved one, say your grandpa, was diagnosed with a critical disease.
That person and his family are poor, and will have hardtimes financing the operation which might succeed or might not. Which might extend his life and then danger might strike again.

You are poor, and want to use your financial resources wisely....

You know that you might be able to finance the operation but at the same time you have deprived yourself or what you've been saving on the expense of something that is bound to happen.

You get confused? now you blame yourself and start reflecting how selfish and material you are.
Then your conscious strikes and say to yourself: "Screw money! Let us save that person" ...then another voice sounds: "you need what you've been earning for your future or contemporary plans: helping other members of family, financing your work, education, etc..."

Then you think again....and say...Financial issues are recoverable but death is not. You might yourself get stroke with a car the next moment, and you are now in the same situation. Would you think the same way? Or you will pray from within that the others save your life?

Or you might just get robbed and loose the money and everything....

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It is a tought decision...from a realistic point of view, please advise.

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Regards,
Elias

Life.


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i'd try to find sponsors ... (i'm a very selfish and material person)
it would depend ofcourse but i don't think your grandfathr or whoever would want you to ruin your future for him
but ofcourse if you think you can handle without the money and the operation would give the person 5 years more to live then life is more important than money ... but if the person would live less than a year and that in agony or smth then i don't know ... it may not be worth it

Life, no question. More money can be made.

Amerasu |

Normally I would side with life, but my grandpa was a real basterd.
Spent several weeks every year picking corn and pinto beans with out so much as a thank you.
Used to mow his 1 acre front yard with a push mower with out so much as a thank you.
Not to mention his bigoted name calling towards me because of my mixed heritage. I just wasn't enough Mexican for him.
Plus he was a terrible alcoholic, which eventually killed him. He dug his own grave and I was fine with letting have it.
No way I would spent my money at my family's expense to save such a life.

I am firm believer in - Whatever you do or decide you have to be able to live with it, be able to face yourself in a mirror and not feel guilty or have second thoughts about that decision. Nothing is worse then having that nagging question in your head - What if I would have ...... ?

Money is a thing - it comes it goes. Life - we all only have one shot at that. To be able to give someone that you love 1 month, 6 month or even longer of live and happiness with little or no pain - what gift to give !

not having a great day here today - sorry lallous

It's not a tough decision at all.

There are only two questions:

Is this person someone you care about?

Are you able to contribute financially (regardelss of whether it will interfere with your plans)?

If the answer to thsoe questions are yes, then you do what is right regardless of any 'inconvenience'. Period.

Even if the answer is no to either of thsoe questions, sometimes you still do anyway.

I don't know anyone in our family that wouldn't give at the drop of a hat to help one of our own. It's part of being a close-knit family. I, for one, couldn't imagine having the guilt of a chance past to help a member of my family in that way, and not taking it.

Think about this: if the tables were turned, and the two of you switched roles, what would he do?

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Theres no point in having money if you can't spend it with loved ones around you.

I think that a person in that situation should do whichever provides him or her the greatest benefit. I'm not going to stand on a moral pedestal and dictate the value of life or the value of money since such relevant values are determined individually. However, I would suggest a discussion concerning the issue with the aged person. Often, the person in supposedly dire need can offer superior insight to aid the decision-making process.



(Edited by metahuman on 08-06-2004 19:41)

money versus the life of somebody you (might) love ...

it's not so complicated, really.

but i'd say a person in that situation should own up to his/her own set of governing values and make the decision before confirming it with the one in dire need. that person does not need to deal with your conscience issues.

sun
//amazing what life teaches us about ourselves//