Somebody happened to send "one of those emails", some sort of joke.
To me.
And an ex.
Who is a classmate and is doing anything she can to ruin my life in class.
The joke was a quizz, promising results... a not-so work compliant one to start with, with questions about favourite sexual positions,
sent to me, another classmate, and my ex.
At the end, the quizz informed me it had been submitted to my classmate.
..along the equivalent from my filthy ex.
I got a bit bitter, and slapped him verbally, sarcastic, but making fun of him at the same "level" he had played.
Talk about a shitty class, we're all 27 years+, not 15, I brought this to his attention, among kind words.
I find the use and existence of such a "joke" outrageous: I don't really care about his reasons to... investigate my sexual past and
the past of my ex, and keeping us informed of this fact??
But he has stolen information from me using the internet.
Am I being a.. you know... moron of some sort on this one? Or is it my right to stand against such a provocative abuse of my private info?
I hate to say it, but your being an asshole in this case.
As you state you are 27+, so yeah it's time to get over it.
As for your "X", let her be petty and filthy. Don't react and you'll be better for it.
It's time you started to let those small, little things that everyday life throws at you, roll right off. You'll be happier and have less stress in the end. Just smile and move on.
Funny stuff JK.
Still, the quizz basically does something illegal in many western countries.
And F1, it was a bit more intrusive than that.
1st things 1st, my company policies are against such webpages (profanity, sex-talk, blah...) and I am monitored-a-lot (and he was supposed to know).
Then the guy has asked "not to have to stand between her and me"... only to collect infos about her, and my, sexual practices and letting us know.
It's no biggy indeed, but it is provocative, letting it go may be an option, but I just don't find the joke funny, and
the context even less: do I really have to laugh? You get the point.
And about the "not being legal" aspect, that shit joke sent private info about me to someone without my consense... this sole fact is a mini-concern.
It was like "yeah, question 10, my latest long term story was shit, and the x still is a pain in the behind as if nobody on this mailing list knew..."
Bitter memories, and the guy who was stealing the details had had an argument about me ASKING ME to avoid mentionning her.
Hell, urging me to avoid mentionning her at all costs.
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In other circumstances it could even have been funny, but he knew it was sensitive and has explicitely broken rules he insisted to set between us.
Hmmm... got documented: thank you for your input, but I think he deserves a hell of a bad time about this,
in order for him, who has crossed the line of arrogance in the past, to remember not to do it again.
The article 179 of the Swiss penal code mentions 4-5 ways in which he crossed the line.
Recording information against someone's will and using it for personal profit, among things,
can lead to penalties up to one year in prison.
....
I take your advice, but I also took other person's advice: if someone has broken the law against me,
and that law exists in the first place, then I may be right, it may be a matter of having my rights respected.
I mean: this situation is ruled by laws, so there have been occurences of stuff like this in the past,
and the state has decided to punish them.
I think you really need to clarify some things here.
What did he do that was illegal? You mention many times that it was not legal, but without details.
Are you saying you actually went to a site that he snet you, that you weren;t supposed because you're at work, and that you answered questions about such things?
Whatever the case, it certainly seems ,from what you've said so far, as though you are 1) taking this way too personally and 2) making this a "tit-for-tat" situation.
Just remember - you cannot possibly claim the higher ground while perpetuating the situation. It's one or the other. Either you're the bigger person, or you 'get even'. Not both...
The article 179 forbids registering information about a person without his/her consense, and sending this to a third party, or using it for personal purposes, among things.
This person has sent me a quizz which was supposed to establish an automated profile based on my answers, so I was tricked into thinking I was talking to a bot.
Both the website who uses this practice and the person who used this website have infringed these articles, as they have fooled me into thinking
I was submitting my information to a bot which could not use them, and did it without asking for my consense, and sent the result to a human third party.
Wether or not I am the one who filled it (this is a moral concern at best), I never agreed to these informations being used this way (this is the legal issue).
Additionally, he, and my class, have commited several acts of calomny, behind my back, after the story with the ex (eg. insults, illegal as well).
There is the personal issue of struggling against jealousy, hypocrisy, and the behavior triggered by my "I don't care but I succeed"
attitude, that's for sure, and that's one of the disturbing aspects.
There is jealousy as well: a supposed friend asking stuff like this from my ex is insulting per se.
But there is the legal issue of joining acts to the words, and pushing me to provide informations which have been, abusively,
collected for his personal pleasure.
------------------------------------
Last time you told me "no tit for tat", you were considering this from a moral perspective.
The latest policeman and lawyers who I talked to told me "In doubt, take legal action. At least if the conflict degenerates, there will be a record of your original claim".
And it proved right.
------------------------------------
Finally, I have tried all means to get the males of my class to stop acting like I had hurt theyre inner wussies:
kindness, discussion, ignorance for months... they keep doing shite like this because of who I am, not what I do, they hate my high salary,
my partying all the time with girls, and my ease of learning and adaptation.
Granted, there are more fascinating things on earth than this, but bump, because:
a) I value your input, somehow you are playing the "devil's advocate", and there is a lot of wisdom to help me.
b) I have started the procedure.
c) I thought there was no place like the Asylum to discuss an "information stolen through the internet" kind of issue.
Plllleeease.
To sum it up, I feel treatened by malpractices from an engineer in training, who uses fat and ugly jokes to collect details about sex stories.
I want him to be prosecuted to the fullest extent of the law.
I have proposed him several times, in several -polite but firm- ways, to find a consensus, to simply get rid of that info, to tell me the "why", to consider
his stupid act.
And after some more discussions with professionals, this is a legal issue regarding:
a) confidentiality over the internet
b) use of private informations
c) respect of one's intimacy
And pertaining laws.
So big-big bump.
~~~ One more thing maybe...
My sad experience has proven me again, tonight, that being *firm* on one's limits mattered a lot to get respect.
Especially where it is broken.
So, wether I appear as an asshole to some -otherwise cool- people, the balance is: - free agressivity in class on the "cons" side, and hostile
people who know their limits and my rights on the "pros" side.
....
Try to walk in my shoes, the right choice is -sadly- straightforward.
But the "you're an asshole" or "you've been an idiot" pointers are useful, they show me the other side of the fence.
Last time you told me "no tit for tat", you were considering this from a moral perspective.
Bear in mind, I'm not telling you what you should do, or what is right.
It is a simple fact, however, that if you involve yourself in 'the game' being played, you are putting yourself on the other person's level.
In some cases, that's a perfectly acceptable way to handle things.
I simply warn that you cannot claim any sort of innocence or moral high ground while involved in the game yourself.
You come across in your first posts as being very much involved in the same immaturity you are scorning. Again, I don't say this in judgement, simply - as you say - as 'devils advocate'.
And you're right, I admit it.
But I have to take action, for the sake of clear relationships in that shitty class, wether they make for real friends or real foes, I hate all that's "in between".
~one important detail I totally forgot to mention: when I took the quiz, it just asked me for a nick, an email adress, and my age...
so I assumed there was no way for it to really get public.
Instead, a session system sent the result to my dear classmate.
quote:InI: Or is it my right to stand against such a provocative abuse of my private info?
If it was not extracted from you against your will, not really. One has to ask, why fill out the quiz in the first place? Keeping something "personal" means keeping it to yourself so that others can't take advantage of you in ways you prefer not to be taken advantage of. If I want to keep something personal, especially something that could put me in a bad light or possibly embarrass me, I keep it to myself, in both the real world and especially the virtual one. Whether they asked your consent or not is irrelevent, you willingly gave the information. Seems like you need a good heaping serving of caution and a nice tall glass of "streetsmarts."
My advice is the same as f1 and Lacuna. Be cool man. Any Retaliation on your part will bring you down to their level. Rise above the petty shit, stay away from or ignore petty people, two very important rules toward aquiring a life of contentment. There are billions of people in this world, so why let a few of the little willingly ignorant vermin ruin your day? In short, who gives a fuck? People suck. And quit stewing over shit also, you're going to have a stroke by the age of 60 if you keep it up.
Roll with the punches. Learn from the one that knock you down. That is how we learn.
Lama Rama, it was extracted against my will, as I pointed out above, it was "disguised" as one of those anonymous personality tests.
I have to stress it really look like the anonymous quiz, as stupid as my taking part to it seems.
The petty people argument is correct, but this is an exception, and while I thank you all for your advice,
I'll have him pay, for the sake of drawing that line I mentionned.
He was in class yesterday, and refused to talk, refused a consensus or to tell me what the hell he was doing with my info,
adding to my arguments.
He was extremely pale when I looked at him, his eyes never crossing mines, and ran away when he - casually - happened to be alone
with me before the lift... he muttered something like "I'll take the stairs" and walked aways trembling.
....
He is terrified on his own.. I did not threaten him or anyone else physically in that class, ever, but I am tall, and scary in looks.
And this is all a more reason to show him I don't need violence to resolve a conflict: he refused mediation
and discussion. This is not about vengeance, this is about justice, respect and balance.
.....................
In the past days, a couple of other stories of this kind, with less impact, had happened to me, and in those issues,
once I firmly decided to react, actively or passively (creating distance silently or setting my limits verbally),
I got a person who hadn't shown the smallest bit of respect towards me for years call and apologize.
I hate spanking babies, but sometimes, you just have to.
End of rant.
I beleive Ram's point is that, while it may have been collected in an underhanded manner, you can't really say that it was 'against your will', since you sat and filled out this form with very personal information. Someone with the knowledge that you have in the area of internet security should know better than to make the assumptions you state.
I know what you're saying, but there is definitely the "shame on you" for falling for it too.
Ok. Well, I trusted the guy, and it was my mistake.
And I guess the "wether I did it against my will" will be the sensitive point of the trial,
can we agree on the fact I never intended to have these informations revealed to a physical person at least?
=> recording the info was my idiocy, but the subsequent misuse?
From: In labyrinths of coral caves Insane since: Aug 2005
posted 03-21-2006 03:28
quote:_Mauro said:But he has stolen information from me using the internet.
Stolen? I think your a wee bit delusional on this subject. Your personal information, has always existed out there for years. Sadly, it's just that now you are becoming aware of it. Deal with it, bra. Deal with it!
quote:_Mauro said:Or is it my right to stand against such a provocative abuse of my private info?
Sorry, Chum but you have NO right to stand against your ill-conceived view of "Private Info"?
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" Overhead the albatross, hangs motionless upon the air "
posted 03-15-2006 00:27
Somebody happened to send "one of those emails", some sort of joke.
Funny stuff JK.
