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Life Change

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Your Text: Insert Slimies » Insert UBB Code » Close Last Tag \| All Tags UBB Help	Pleased you respect my opinion. Means a lot. DL's got two good points. They're the ones you need to keep track of when you're taking stock of your life. Is it a rut you want to get out of, or is it a lifestyle you want to get out of? Life's good for me these days. I've got a boyfriend who I love and who loves me. I've got a home I truly can call a home. I sip coffee from a French Press and work every day for good money doing fun things. Could change in any moment. The temptation to run during the calm before the storm... [b]strong[/b]. First time it occurred to me to run off and try to follow a dream was back in the late 90s. Wanted to go to New York, study music and theater. Wanted to be the next big thing. Wanted so much. What kept me from following that dream was not thinking I couldn't do it. Wasn't that I was afraid (I was). Wasn't that anyone dissuaded me from it (everyone thought it was a grand idea). No, what kept me was I hate giving up. Tenacity. I wasn't finished working on this life. I was doing too many drugs, shooting thousands of dollars into my arms. Wasn't miserable, just realized my lifestyle wasn't what it should have been. Wasn't what my mother raised me to believe was 'the good life.' So, I figured out what it was that needed changing, and changed it. A decade later, I'm really quite pleased I didn't jump ship and follow a half-baked dream of adventure. Sure, it would've been fun--it would've been a LOT of fun. Up all night, work all day, run ragged to the bone, pushing the limits of what my psychology could handle. That sort of intensity, it's a tempting thing. And I am sorry I never got to do it. That sorrow, however, doesn't outweigh my general love of how my life turned out. There are no easy answers here. We all stumble. We all look to the horizon and ponder what heaven's really like. We think about futures we'll never see, battles we'll never fight, people we'll never meet, and dreams that will never see the light of day. And we get up every morning anyway. I don't have any intention of dissuading you from polishing off the remaining 'young' years of your life with constant travel and excitement. I have no desire to stand on someone else's dreams and proclaiming, for all the world to hear, that it's not a good idea and shame on you and why won't[i]you[/i]think[i]about[/i]your[i]mother[/i]. No. I won't be that guy. I will remind you, delicately--oh so delicately--that the decision [i]will[/i] affect you for the rest of your life. Life will never, ever be the same. You'll see things, you'll do things, and you will change because of it. Of course, we are capricious, we humans. Always changing anyway. Live life to its fullest? That just means you go to sleep without the weight of the world on your shoulders, and wake up in the morning, greeting the sun with a smile. You ever want to talk about that in more detail, the ICQ (8520632) is never too far away from me. [small](Edited by [url=http://www.ozoneasylum.com/user/329]twItch^[/url] on 01-20-2007 22:36)[/small] Loading...
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