How many chances for a relationship to grow out of an affair? — OZONE Asylum, home of the Mad Scientists

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How many chances for a relationship to grow out of an affair?

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Your Text: Insert Slimies » Insert UBB Code » Close Last Tag \| All Tags UBB Help	Interesting views, join mines in many ways. I'd tend to say that cheating is self defeating in many cases, because it's aimed at replacing something missing, not at the new partner, and basing a new relationship on lies as White Hawk pointed out. What, then, is considered cheating, depends solely on the implied agreement that is broken : kiss and dance can be cheating IF it breaks the agreement, etc. I think and feel, as the purpose of couple in our cultures is to create a bond strong enough to transmit proper behavorial patterns to kids, that such cheating behavior from a partner stems mostly from his/her insecurities, as in "I am craving for attention, not sure I can make it through the couple, I may be hurt so let's hurt first". All lines of thinking that are very much self destructive, and impacting relationships outside of the couple, as pointed out. I am no cheater, if my talk is not enough to point it out. I happen to have a very strong seduction, which has been hindering my partners trust in the past and incidentally causing these patterns - although I have never been doing anything wrong in years. I wish our societies, in reply to Blaise, would carry strong family values because my concern here is for children and our future, since young people today already see other human beings as consumable goods. In the case b that I quoted above, I saw the girl, in appearance very strong minded, but cheated on in the past, drown into such behavior - although evidences of her cheating are slim, but evidences of lies, obvious - because she was getting mad at his succesful persona, afraid she would lose control she broke the guy in two by putting up an act that, to this day, remains hazy, and God knows he had gone into extremes to show what he was about. Poor guy. [b]This leaves me with the question of honesty in couple : how far should it go and is the room for "little white lies"? How do you accept white lies yourself?[/b] I've also observed incredible patterns in the past days, of one of my ex gfs who left for example : she had treated me like horseshit for I was young, faithful but stupid and consistently jealous. She recently confessed to me, as she is with a guy since two years or so, that it took her a whole year to get over me, and she missed me all the time. Remembering these feelings (and some booze) led her into messaging me about how much she would like to be single. Appreciated but weird. This specific pattern seems to be reoccuring in my personal life btw, many exes will go as far as dumping me, only to call me a few weeks after, remembering the fun, the sensuality, the intelligence, the adventure. I'd tone down the cockiness if I wanted to be anyone but myself. All this crap in the name of love... I'd give self confidence classes, might be the way to go about healing wounded societies : I've had them all, the artsy, the antisocial, the strongly sexual, the working woman, the religious, so different profiles, and yet a "get back rewind" sense of "at some point they mess up, then they regret for years" - so what, let's get dorkish and act repelling? Call that a paradox. Loading...
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