Topic awaiting preservation: lmao - tech support sarcasm

The poster has demanded we remove all his contributions, less he takes legal action.
We have done so.
Now Tyberius Prime expects him to start complaining that we removed his 'free speech' since this message will replace all of his posts, past and future.
Don't follow his example - seek real life help first.

Back in my high school years ( ~7years ago ) , I've seen 2 girls quite happy to read the e-mail put by default in the inbox folder of outlook when you install it. Those silly twit even answered it Obviously we had no internet connection.

Mathieu "POÏ" HENRI

The poster has demanded we remove all his contributions, less he takes legal action.
We have done so.
Now Tyberius Prime expects him to start complaining that we removed his 'free speech' since this message will replace all of his posts, past and future.
Don't follow his example - seek real life help first.

When I was teaching software at New Horizons we had one mouse with R and L written on the buttons with a Sharpie. The instructor had gotten frustrated at a student who didn't know the difference between a right and left click.

:::11oh1:::

The poster has demanded we remove all his contributions, less he takes legal action.
We have done so.
Now Tyberius Prime expects him to start complaining that we removed his 'free speech' since this message will replace all of his posts, past and future.
Don't follow his example - seek real life help first.

The poster has demanded we remove all his contributions, less he takes legal action.
We have done so.
Now Tyberius Prime expects him to start complaining that we removed his 'free speech' since this message will replace all of his posts, past and future.
Don't follow his example - seek real life help first.

My Dad tells me that the Oracle tech support people (he works with Oracle DB's), that when someone gets on the line and says someone stupid they say: "Oh, thats just an I-D10 T error."

Well, I thought it was funny.

Yeah, we have several phrases for people like that:

ID:10T error
Error exists BBOCAK (between back of chair and keyboard)
Operator Headspace
Error when procID = cpuspeed / IQ, cannot divide by 0

Probably the most common conversation I had while working for Symantec was:

"Hello, thank you for calling symantec technical support, what is the nature of your problem?"
"My computer won't do ________"
"Are you at the computer now?"
"No, I'm on my cell phone in my car, do I have to be at my computer???"
*heavy sigh*





It's only after we've lost everything...
That we're free to do anything...

i work as an it technician at a college, and we have to do a helpdesk rota, some of the calls are classics. i'm at work now so i cant really give examples incase certain people are watching.

i can relate with all of the above though

LOL

 

hehehehe, I still like the classic 'Where is the ANY key?'

The poster has demanded we remove all his contributions, less he takes legal action.
We have done so.
Now Tyberius Prime expects him to start complaining that we removed his 'free speech' since this message will replace all of his posts, past and future.
Don't follow his example - seek real life help first.

I still remember my most favorite call-

Pets: What can I do for you?
Guy: um.... my computer's on fire...
Pets: Um... put it out and call the fire department...


Code - CGI - links - DHTML - Javascript - Perl - programming - Magic - http://www.twistedport.com
ICQ: 67751342

Similar stuff when I was a telephone operator in college.

I was once asked how you call 1-800-CALL-ATT.

I was also once told, "I'd like to place a call to my daughter, but then have the charges reversed back to me." Think about it.

I used to do customer support for Compuserve. One of my favorite calls was the elderly gentleman who called in pleading to me to " not turn him in" and that "he didn't know he did anything wrong." After spending ten minutes calming the customer down turns out he had received a "you have attempted an illegal operation" error message.

classic.

Techsupport: what can i do for you?
client : give me the number.
TS: what number?
client: the phone number
TS: what Phone number sir?
client : the number from the techsupport department
client: ~sigh~
TS: you are already connected to the techsupport, what can we do for you?
client: i want to speak to the other guy.
......

__________________________________________
"Art has to be forgotten. Beauty must be realized."
Piet Mondriaan

There's plenty where this came from: Computer Stupidities.

There's a whole section on tech support in there.

I always liked this one
http://www.cyberartsweb.org/cpace/infotech/cars.html


It's only after we've lost everything...
That we're free to do anything...