Preserved Topic: Remember When a.k.a. Back in the Day (Page 1 of 1)

Disclaimer: Anyone who is in a good mood, don't read this. It's 3:00 AM, I'm fairly drunk and have been watching old videos. I'm not a fun guy right now and I'm writing merely to purge.

After years of putting it off, I have finally decided to begin cataloguing and preserving all my old video tapes. You see, I used to be the geek (used to be?) who always had the video camera there to record all the dumb stuff we did in high school and early college. Oh, sure they loved to make fun of me at the time, but I treasure nothing more than these old low-quality tapes and I am constantly begged for copies.

And as I review them all, me there with all my friends hanging out like there's nothing else in the world more important than hanging out with all my friends, a wave of nostalgia and depression, amplified by a six pack of Shiner Bock, has come over me.

Here I am, a few years later, not entirely happy with who I have become or where I have arrived, willing to give anything at all to be back there again...the night we all got drunk together, some of us for the first time, swapping ridiculous urban legends...the night we rappeled off the side of UTA Fine Arts building...the night we experimented with hypnotism (fairly successfully, I might add)...the night we hung out at an enormous children's playground called Kidsville, drinking sodas and eating chocolate-frosted donuts...(did we do everything at night?)...

I remember staying up till dawn one weekend discussing some surprisingly impressive theories concerning the meaning of life. (Honestly, I still hold on to some of the beliefs we molded that night.)

And you know what? I feel like everyone else has grown up and I'm the only one who still wants to do these things. I'd burn all my possessions right now just to warp back to those days.

I know I'm not alone in missing "the good old days," but is it possible, as we grow older, to still stay up all night and have fun for fun's sake? I'm more than willing, but I don't know anyone else who is. Thirty is approaching faster than I'd like it to, and if there's no more pointless fun in sight, then I'd like just to get off at the next stop, thank you very much...

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I know I'm not alone in missing "the good old days," but is it possible, as we grow older, to still stay up all night and have fun for fun's sake? I'm more than willing, but I don't know anyone else who is. Thirty is approaching faster than I'd like it to, and if there's no more pointless fun in sight, then I'd like just to get off at the next stop, thank you very much...

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yeah, most ppl have learned their limits and not to burn the candle at both ends.. sounds trite, i know, but i'll bet lots of your buddies are married now or have other major responsibilities to deal with.. my experience says that it is mostly the singles who think about silliness.. too many others get carried away by 'serious' business, thoughts, and their perceptions of what they think of as being 'adult'. yet, even these folks have time for silliness, though it's frequently/usually planned for rather than spontaneous..
does that sound sad? not really, at least they know they need it in their lives and find space for it in their schedules

btw, turning 30 is not the end of the world... it beats the alternative if i remember correctly, Hillary was over 30 when he did Everest.. lol, gone braindead for the moment. can't think of any other great examples.. must be the time of night and lack of sleep... oh, why did i mention Hillary? because he followed his dreams.. climbed the highest peak on the planet and didn't let age stop him.



~velvetrose

I think I know exactly what ya mean Wes.. the thread I started further down in this forum (thoughts on life...) has a similar theme to it.

I think Velvet Rose has a great point about the single aspect of it. Married people who have families just havent got the time to sit down and contemplate, too busy.. an advantage I reckon to being married or in a relationship.

Don't let it bug ya too much... dwelling in the past is not always good imho.. don't forget the past but recognize that it is the past and always look forward..

ps hope the hangover aint too bad! heh ~Vp~

Lots of people go through that same thing, if not all. Some people barely give it a thought and others give it entirely too much. Life goes on and things do change, thank God for that. Believe me Wes, you'd be bored to tears if it had been the same all this time.

That crack about not being entirely happy with who you've become? I think you're a helluva guy and I'm sure anyone that's had the pleasure would say the same. Whadya want?

BTW, sounds like the "pointless fun" wasn't entirely pointless in retrospect, pointy fun is fun too.


Jason

"And you know what? I feel like everyone else has grown up and I'm the only one who still wants to do these things."

Well I'm comin' up on '54'.... I still do these things. My wife of 14 years still does these things. Never stop doing these things. Modify them a bit.... sure... but never *stop* doing "these things"....

"these things" make up who you are. Stop doing them... you're no longer yourself. (i'm not talking about big time abuse... here.. just things you like to do.) Do them... get at it.... or get *back* at it.

It's my observation that people who *grow-up* loose track of that inner child.... loose that... you've pretty much lost it all.

I've never *really* grown up.... but getting older has it's benefits. Older I get... the more I know.. the more I know... the easier it gets.... and I figure I was put here for a good time.... not a bad time ( & there have been bad times.... ) but I most certainly wan't put here for a 'long time.'


Don't sweat the small stuff.... ENJOY!!!




[This message has been edited by NoJive (edited 06-03-2001).]

OUCH...............im 48 years old.......still feel like 20........the wife an i ....(married 20 years)....still........when the kids go to bed stay up till we mornin light havin fun drinking fine wine relaxing to a pipe full of herb. Life gets better as you grow.

You all are to young to be in a dead end.

Rutts are a bitch to over come........remember a rut is nothing more then a shallow grave with the ends blown out.......and when ya cant look up ya stuck in that shallow rutt.

Get out and live...........ive been a street bandit for 30 years...........what a fun time ...fun life.....fun toys......fun fun fun......

you cant get me down because im so high on life there is no down only up........................

Any one here live in 24 hour bliss.....i do.........there isnt one second of any day that i feel worried or doubt.
At the end of everyday there isnt one i wouldnt do over.....well there was the vasectomy.......seeing a male doctor with a scalpel that close to the family jewels was a bit humbling.........but hey.......when your 48 going on 20 ya gotta prepare yourself for no-surprises......................hehehehehe

Any one wondering how i do it.........well.......some of us try a lot harder then others....... Its easy to give up...and tougher to see things to the end.........there isnt one here who couldnt sacrifice a few years for many.........get ya head out of the gutter and live your destiny.......most people are un-happy because they where afraid to chase who they are and settled for what comfort they could secure.......................yep......un-happy lazy scared un-willing to take a chance.....afraid to turn up the fire.........afraid to look foolish to all those who arnt looking.............get it up and get it going..........:-)

You see, I agree with NoJive. "Grown-ups" get me down. I feel like the people that I know have stopped hanging out, having fun, etc., because it's just "time to stop doing that."

I hear things like, "This isn't high school anymore," or, "We're married now, we can't do that stuff."

No, it isn't high school anymore. In fact, we have more freedom now than we used to; why can't we take advantage of that? And sure, we all have more responsibilities now, but personally I don't see how being legally married stops you from letting loose. I can't imagine getting married and then stopping doing the things I enjoy. I was living with someone for 4 years, all but married, and we jumped at a late-night get-together.

You know, I've got responsibilities, too. But, that doesn't stop me from having a good time. Maybe it's just the people I know. I should start hanging out with you guys...

BTW, thanks, JK. I think maybe I just need the opportunity to let loose and remember what I liked about me...

It's all abut "identity."

Now you may think I'm getting off track here a bit... but not really.

Before we married, I suggested to my wife- to-be, that she retain her maiden name. She was a bit perplexed at first but I explained that I like her just the way she is... name and all. I have this *thing* about women changing their names when they marry... I don't like it. It goes back to when women were 'property'... unfortunately a lot of men still think this way. Anyway... it was my way of saying you are your own person... do what you want, when you want.. you don't need *my* permission to lead *your* life. And I don't need *her* permission etc.

Now I'm not talkin' about screwing everything in sight when the other's out of same... but I am talking about pretty much everything else.

eg: Caroline...I'm Clive btw (hence nojive.. but also i don't take much either ... anyway Caroline just got back from 4 days away with 4 friends and they just partied their butts off. Good... I'm glad... I'm happy. Another week she'll be gone for another 4 days... 25 hundred mile trip for her brothers 50th. Last year she went to Portugal for a month.

Who the hell am I to tell her she can't do any of this stuff? That's who she is... that's who I fell in love with. I'd never considered telling her she can't do something because that would mean she could tell me not to do something.

I'm not as wild (uhmmm... 'active' is perhaps a better word).. as I used to be but I still go on what I call my "walk about's" 24-48 hours... head downtown...check out the bars... find a good blues joint... shoot some pool... or I could go to a kite festival for 3 or 4 days. Why shouldn't I... that's what I was doing before I met her.

Still with me? It's all about who you are... your *identity.* Don't let them Swallow you up. :-)

And should you ever consider marriage... suggest to *her* she retain her maiden name. :-) :-)

I'm only 22, and I feel the same way, Wes. I miss my buddies from elementary school, I miss the guys I hung around with when I was 18 or 19. We used to dance every weekend in a different location, with many beers, many games of "Therapy" and lots of fun. I feel quite alone with my memories at this stage. Most people went away to study in faraway places or got jobs in other parts of the country. I want my friends back, I want those evenings back. But anyhow - I won't have them back. I need to get along with what I have and what I am. That's truly painful sometimes. You know what backs me up? VHS videos, pictures, photos and the sincerity that there are people out there who still think along the same lines.

There are people out there who miss you just like you miss them, Wes. Never forget that.

Don't forget there are also people out there who are too busy living their lives tonight to miss yesterday; the knowledge of them comforts me.

Wow, fanasating thred... time for me to dribble my thoughts on the matter

<DRIBBLE>

I used to do those kind of things too, like jumping off 15 meter high train bridges into rivers just for kicks!

But in all honesty, i don't really want to go back in time to be at that point again. Sure it was hell fun! but I've learnt more of the world now, I know myself better and I have some sort of direction in life. Back then I didn't! And the thought of even existing in the world only knowing what I knew back then scares the hell out of me! Hell, I'm only 21 now, but for some reason I've always look at the past couple of years as the best years of my life, no matter what age I was.

I still go out nightclubing, dancing and get plastred every once and a while. But nowadays I actualy ~do~ something with my life as well, mostly beacuse I have too. I have bills to pay and goals to achieve. But I try not to let that spoil my fun!

I often find myself questioning my life and past choices but I have always tried to live by the following Philosophy:

When it all comes down to the crunch, your life is nothing more than a string of experiences. The most important things in your life will always be in the past! You can never be totaly certain of what is in the future. Therefore your aim in life should be to make the memory of your past as plesant as possible.

This kind of goes hand in hand with an old saying my dad used to tell me, infact he still tells me this from time to time...

With experience comes age....
But age does not always bring experience.....

Whenever i find myself depressed I try and think about this. Sooner or later I realise that being depressed is not something I want to remember! I'm not gaining anything from it! Hell, I'd be better off wasting my time by drawing a picture! I may even come accross this drawing many years down the track when I'm depressed again and it mau even make me smile. It will then be something I remember, something that makes me feel good and makes life seem worthwile again.

The thought of being old and not experienced scares the hell out of me! So I always try and suck as much as I can from everything I do.

I also ask my self If i truely like who I am and if I like the collection of memories that I have gathered throughout my life. I've always answered yes! Therefore I think I've had a good life so far.

Oh yeah, I also used to carry a small peice of paper around in my wallet that said:

If your not have fun your not living! so Change!

I lost it when I lost my wallet but I used to read whenever I was sad. Once it made get on the closest bus I saw and I ended up in Sandgate! so I sat on the beach for several hours thinking about stuff then went home. I'll treasure that memory till the day I die and it was all because of that little peice of paper.

</DRIBBLE>

I get the feeling that some think I'm talking about going back in time and being who we used to be. That's entirely not the case. (For example, OpticBurn says that people are too busy living their lives today to miss yesterday.)

I'm not talking about getting together and pining over our teenage years. I'm talking about taking advantage of who we are today and having fun with it. No, I don't want to go back when I was a complete dork (read: complete) and had no money and had to be in by midnight. I would like just to stop and have some good fun once in a while, which doesn't seem to be happening at all anymore.

Again, yes, people get busy. So do I. I just sense a general unwillingness to take full advantage of a night off. But, maybe I'm just thinking of a couple of people in particular. Maybe I need to find some new people who don't schedule grocery shopping to the hour.

Wes.....you need to attend the High Times grass smoke off......OH-YEA......thats a trip worth taking.

All the best strains in the world are there to sample and buy.........that ought to wake you up some and get you stimulated....hehehehe

Ill be there.........:-)

Sounds like a good idea...do they have sponsor programs...?

I don't know when exactly, but somewhere along the way to adulthood I discovered age didn't matter.

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How old would you be if you didn't know how old you were?

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I still do silly things and have meaningless fun, just less it seems not because I'm too adult or grown up, but because I've developed diferent priorities.

It must be really nice to have all these nice memories. I dont have the wonderful memories of what I did when I was young and stupid. I get kind of jealous when I hear ppl talk about all the fun they had and wish they could do the same things again. I was raised in a very strict house by parents who thought of me as a money provider. From the time I was 18 I was there to work and make money for them. Before that I was homeshooled and never socialized. I dont want to sound like I was complaining. But from the time I was 18 I have worked...and thats all. So here I am. 24. Ive been on my own for about 3 years. I have been working and trying to stay alive. I am now trying to make memories for myself.

Be thankful you have the memories you do! There are people out there that dont.

CarltonCig, don't worry my friend, those memories are quite often overrated. I do have fond memories from the past but hardly as Wes described. Read the "introvert" thread to get a better feel for how some of us view those earlier years. I *hated* High School, utterly. I *hated* college, utterly. I couldn't be happier that those "good ole times" are gone and I can now concentrate on living life the way I want to.

So FWIW, use your time wisely now that it sounds you have more choices in your life and stay positive. There is very little benefit in lamenting the past, stay focused on present and future. Peace.