ONE-POINT OFFICE DARES
1: Run one lap around the office at top speed.
2: Groan out loud in the toilet cubicle (at least one other 'non-player' must be in the toilet at the time).
3: Ignore the first five people who say 'good morning' to you.
4: Phone someone in the office you barely know, leave your name and say,
"Just called to say I can't talk right now. Bye."
5: To signal the end of a conversation, clamp your hands over your ears and grimace.
6: When someone hands you a piece of paper, finger it, and whisper huskily, Mmmmmmm, that feels soooooo good!".
7: Leave your zipper open for one hour. If anyone points it out, say,
"Sorry, I really prefer it this way".
8: Walk sideways to the photocopier.
9: While riding an lift, gasp dramatically every time the doors open.
THREE-POINTS DARES
1: Say to your boss, "I like your style" and shoot him with double-barrelled fingers.
2: Babble incoherently at a fellow employee then ask, "Did you get all that, I don't want to have to repeat it".
3: Page yourself over the intercom (do not disguise your voice).
4: Kneel in front of the water cooler and drink directly from the nozzle (there must be a 'non-player' within sight).
5: Shout random numbers while someone is counting.
FIVE POINT DARES
1: At the end of a meeting, suggest that, for once, it would be nice to conclude with the singing of the national anthem (extra points if you actually launch into it yourself).
2: Walk into a very busy person's office and while they watch you with growing irritation, turn the light switch on/off 10 times.
3: For an hour, refer to everyone you speak to as "Bob".
4: Announce to everyone in a meeting that you "really have to go do a number two".
5: After every sentence, say 'mon' in a really bad Jamaican accent. As in "the report's on your desk, mon". Keep this up for one hour.
6: While an office mate is out, move their chair into the lift.
7: In a meeting or crowded situation, slap your forehead repeatedly and mutter, "Shut up, damn it, all of you just shut up!".
8: At lunchtime, get down on your knees and announce, "As God is my witness, I'll never go hungry again".
9: In a colleagues diary, write in 10am: "See how I look in tights".
10: Carry your keyboard over to your colleague and ask "You wanna trade?".
11: Repeat the following conversation 10 times to the same person: "Do you hear that?" "What?" "Never mind, it's gone now".
12: Come to work in army fatigues and when asked why, say, "I can't talk about it".
13: Posing as a maitre d', call a colleague and tell him he's won a lunch for four at a local restaurant. Let him go.
14: Speak with an accent (French, German, Porky Pig, etc)! during a very important conference call.
15: Find the vacuum and start vacuuming around your desk.
16: Hang a two-foot long piece of toilet roll from the back of your pants and act genuinely surprised when someone points it out.
17: Present meeting attendees with a cup of coffee and biscuit, smash each biscuit with your fist.
18: During the course of a meeting, slowly edge your chair towards the door.
19: Arrange toy figures on the table to represent each meeting attendee, move them according to the movements of their real-life counterparts.
And if that wasn't enough for you...
1: At lunchtime, sit in your parked car with sunglasses on and point a hairdryer at passing cars. See if they slow down.
2: Tell your children over dinner. "Due to the economy, we are going to have to let one of you go."
3: Every time someone asks you to do something, ask if they want fries with that.
4: Put your rubbish bin on your desk and label it "IN."
5: Put decaf in the coffee maker for 3 weeks. Once everyone has got over his or her caffeine addictions, switch to espresso.
6: In the subject field for all your e-mails, write " FOR SEXUAL FAVOURS".
7: Finish all your sentences with "In accordance with the prophecy."
8: Don't use any punctuation
9: As often as possible, skip rather than walk.
10: Ask people what sex they are. Laugh hysterically after they answer.
11: Specify that your drive-through order is "to go."
12: Sing along at the opera.
13: Go to a poetry recital and ask why the poems don't rhyme.
14: Put mosquito netting around your work area. Play a tape of jungle sounds all day.
15: Five days in advance, tell your friends you can't attend party because you're not in the mood.
16: Have your co-workers address you by your wrestling name, Rock Hard.
17: When the money comes out of the ATM, scream "I Won! I Won! 3rd time this week!!!"
18: When leaving the zoo, start running towards the parking lot yelling, "Run for your lives, they're loose!"
posted 02-19-2003 13:40
